Monday, May 17, 2010

Dream Maker Heavenly Dolphin

Dream maker, dream maker, make me a dream... Okay, that's probably too much to ask for from a single toy, but this rabbit-style vibrator has a lot to offer if you're a fan of filling, rotating, wiggling fun.


The Dream Maker Heavenly Dolphin...

(Wait a minute. Seriously, what is with the names of sex toys these days? Who's doing the marketing on this suckers that you need a name that's four words long? How about Diving Dolphin? Wave-Wonder? Dreamy Dolphin? Listen, sex toy-making companies: Call me for marketing assistance. Really. I mean it.)

Okay, back to your regularly scheduled review. Ahem.

This toy comes in some seriously smart, pretty packaging. It looks like this:

And also like this:

It's like a lunchbox for your sex toy. Which I think is cool for a couple of reasons. First, unlike so much of the sex toy packaging, which involves a ton of cheap plastic, this one is metal. Thus, it's recyclable or reusable. It holds the intended vibe nicely -- and I like the foam padding, because it's absorbent, which means that you can place the toy on top of it after cleaning to air dry. On the other hand, if you took out the foam, you could fit a number of play things in here (meaning toys, not people!) for storage or transportation. It doesn't have a handle, but it does have a solid closure clasp, so no worries about things falling open. Size-wise, it's about the length of a shoe box, but skinnier.


The dolphin is made of a polymer blend, which is one of my favorites because it can be (as it is in the case) soft and squishy, yet fairly firm. I'm not a huge fan of overly hard toys for internal use -- I like a little bend in my end -- and this one fits the bill for me in that regard. It's also somewhere in the middle as far as porousness, which means it can be washed easily with soap and water (but no-no-no on the boiling!) and will take kindly to silicone- or water-based lube. It should also be wearing a condom if you're going to be sharing it. 


So, I have to admit that I haven't been a huge fan of rabbit-style vibes in the past despite their apparent popularity. Why? It's something about the fact that the shape doesn't always fit my body -- either the shaft doesn't bend to hit my g-spot or the clit-wigglers don't actually reach my clit. Which is part of the reason I wanted to try this one out. Surprisingly, this one actually does both -- in fact, I now understand why women like rabbit vibes.

Here's what it has to offer:
  1. It's big. I mean to the point where I laughed when I pulled it out of the package. The thing is nearly ten inches long! Of course, much of that is taken up with the control panel (more on that later), so there's only about five inches of insertable length, but still, that combined with the girth (about 1 and three-quarters inches in diameter) was enough to make me gasp. I've had trouble getting things of that size inserted in the past (and must admit that I'm not much of a size queen -- shape is more important to my pleasure), but the bend-ability and give of the material made this work for me.
  2. It's seriously waterproof. I had my doubts, because the control panel looks like it would leak a lot. But it doesn't, or hasn't yet. And I submerged it in the sink just to test it out and it withstood it just fine. 
  3. It's got a lot of options. Truthfully, this is both a good and a bad thing. Here's the control panel:

A little confusing, right? Basically, the buttons on the left control the speed and intensity/variation of the shaft, while the buttons on the right control the speed and intensity/variation of the dolphin nose (clit stimulator). The star ... does something. I think it lights up and tells you what you're doing, but it's kind of like Morse Code and I have no idea which sequence of lights means which program.

For me, I tend to find one "program" that I like and stick with it -- which means I end up flicking through the buttons a lot until I find the one that I used last time. There's no memory on the thing, so it starts in the same spot every time. Now I have it memorized: Click the left button four times, click the right button five times, and that'll give me the combination that works best for me. Good if you like a lot of variety. Maybe overkill if you tend to use the same type of stimulation again and again.

Along the options line, there's a wide variety of power and speed. The vibrating balls inside (I don't know quite what they're for, but my guess is a combination of rigidness and extra stimulation) rotate the shaft in a variety of ways, from small circles to big, from slow and easy to pretty darn high. Ditto with the dolphin nose (which I happen to think is pretty cute :P)

What's Bad? Just a few things:
  1. It takes four, yes, four AAA batteries. Holy hells. I use rechargeable batteries. But still. 
  2. It's kind of loud until it's inserted. And even then, it hums along pretty good. I would say that the noise is equivalent to the speed and power, so it's a trade-off, but it's definitely not one of the more subtle toys I've played with.
  3. Your enjoyment of the toy seems entirely dependent on your physiology. I suppose this is true of all toys, but especially those that are designed with dual stimulation in mind. This toy works for me because it hits my g-spot and my clit without a lot of adjusting, but that's not going to be true for everyone. Unfortunately, there is no try-before-you-buy option, and with a nearly $70 price tag, you're taking a big risk if it doesn't suit your body type. 

PROS: Easy to use and clean. Lots of options. Darn good orgasms.

CONS: Too many options? Uses a lot of batteries. Expensive.



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